December 12, 2011
Originally published on Literary Escapism during their Black Friday event.
Darnell, David's Second, is interviewed by Sheldon, Richart's Second.
Sheldon: Hey, man. How's it going?
Darnell: *sighs* Don't ask.
Sheldon: Is something up? We could do the interview another day.
Darnell: No, today's fine. Have you by any chance seen Marcus?
Darnell: What about Richart?
Sheldon: He's . . . hunting.
Darnell: Lisette or Etienne?
Sheldon: Not tonight. Not so far. Why? What's going on?
Darnell: I'm trying to find an immortal I can con into doing my Christmas shopping for me.
Sheldon: *stares at him, then bursts into laughter* Seriously?
Darnell: Absolutely. They have super strength and super speed. Those guys can get in and get out of a store in no time at all and crowds would prove no obstacle. I, on the other hand, could shop twenty-four hours a day from now until Christmas and still not get a present for everyone on my list. I'm starting late because of all of the vampire troubles that have arisen and don't know how I'm going to get it all done.
Sheldon: I could help you out. Richart has been spending a lot of time . . . elsewhere. So I have some free time on my hands. I still have a couple of my own I need to get anyway.
Darnell: *relief blankets his features* That would be great. Thanks. *reaches down and picks up a binder about an inch thick that is propped against his chair and drops it in Sheldon's lap* I really appreciate it.
Sheldon: What's this?
Darnell: My gift list. Well, most of it.
Sheldon: *eyes the binder with dread* You're kidding, right?
Darnell: No. I'm David's Second. He's the second eldest and most powerful immortal on the planet. When Seth is needed in two places at once, David takes up the slack. Where David goes, I go. And he goes all over the world. So I pretty much know every Immortal Guardian currently living, as well as their Seconds. Hence, my gift list.
Darnell: Now I just need to think of something good to give Seth and David. I hate shopping for those two. They're thousands of years old. What do you give men who have seen and done everything?
Sheldon: You don't really expect me to
Darnell: I need to find something special for Ami, too. Living with Marcus is probably driving her up the wall.
Sheldon: Speaking of . . . I heard you weren't too thrilled about her becoming Marcus's Second.
Darnell: I was furious, actually.
Darnell: Marcus loved Bethany for eight hundred years. His behavior has grown increasingly erratic since her departure. I'm afraid he'll get Ami killed.
Sheldon: I'mmmmm pretty sure Seth and David wouldn't let that happen.
Darnell: Seth and David have been insanely busy lately. Contrary to popular belief, they can't be everywhere at once.
Sheldon: You may be worrying over nothing anyway. The guys at The Network think Marcus is going to pull a Roland and scare Ami off.
Darnell: *laughs* I'd like to see him try. Ami is a lot tougher than she looks. *cell phone buzzes* Hang on a sec. *retrieves phone from a back pocket* Yeah? . . . Wait. What? . . . Marcus and Ami did? . . . What? . . . No. David isn't here . . . No. I'm on my way. *ends call and tucks away his phone* Gotta book.
Darnell: *adjusts the weapons strapped to him and points to the binder* Thanks for helping me out with that, man. I owe you. *leaves*
Sheldon: But I . . . *looks down at the binder* Crud. *thinks a moment, then takes out a cell and dials* Richart? Yeah, me. You feel like doing some shopping? *frowns* No, I'm not high.
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